Hence, we all know there's a lot more to it than just finding your guy. Like my grandma used to say: “sometimes happiness presents itself caught between two rocks”. What a frustrating image! But it contains a wise advice: happiness is a matter of dedication and persistence. In other words: dedication to know a person of another culture, and persistence in fusing both cultures equally.
You might have been lucky enough to meet your cute Asian boy personally. If so, you made it, and together (in the same time zone) will make it happen... The End!... right? Well, up to here it’s no different from other relationships. However, a cyber relationship has it's differences, and the bi-cultural factor accentuates them.
| Internet dating is very common... |
Internet dating is very common. Naturally it has its challenges, too. But these challenges intensify when you are dealing with cultural differences, and distance. Things are some more intense, and little details make it very special. But, it can get messy if you overlook certain things. Check these out:
- Time Zone: having strong genes against premature aging is your salvation against the damaging effects of sleep deprivation. If you don’t, then make sure you buy the best anti-aging products available. Time difference can be as much as 12 hours. While he’s sleeping you’re working (or partying), and the other way around. Meaning that, spontaneously communicating with each other is very unlikely to happen. A finely synchronized logistic is required to make it happen. It also is prudent to take turns to pull the all-nighter. Making sure not to interfere with one another’s work or study schedule. This might seem trivial, but going around a few weeks without enough sleep can really have negative side effects. Also, not paying attention to your special person due to work or study can cause resentment. We all know how that goes! So make a schedule that works for both.
- Advanced Technology: it’s so frustrating to have internet failures in the midst of chatting! You are left there, just hanging in suspense, even more after a teasing remark. Insecurity waves shocking through your brain as you wait: “did I offend him?”; “He might think I’m tacky”; “He’s clueless”. But of all the cyber failures, a lousy web cam is the worst! Have you ever seen your image frozen on screen? Why does it have to be the ugliest gesture? A horribly twisted mouth while saying ‘I love you’ or, with your eyes half open like on an LSD trip. You remain perplexed, staring at your disfigured image. Waiting to sign in again, and show him your best possible smile...
- Translations and Interpretation. Be careful with the translations, even more if you both are using a second language. Word order, meaning and even definitions can vary immensely. And if you are using an automatic translator, please use in moderation. With these tools, complex sentences and paragraphs translate into incoherent blobs of words. Be patient. Don’t take it literally. Get to know his first language to make a better sense of your conversations. For example: reading literature (translated to your language, of course!) can help you learn the way thoughts and ideas are organized, and expressed. Logically, this also applies to him. Plus, exchanging language lessons is very enticing, enhancing the chance of getting to know each other better.
- The Meeting: this is the most important and exciting part of cyber dating. Therefore, it should be planned carefully. It’s prudent to make a budget. Get as much information about costs and traveling expenses. Most importantly: organize all documents, visas, and traveling requirements needed for international trips. These are lengthy processes, and take a great deal of time to complete. Don’t get caught unprepared. Be ready to board the first flight!
Although these details seem insignificant, they can adversely delay, distort and even impede a good communication. Be prepared, and peacefully enjoy your interracial cyber love until you decide to get official… but this is a totally new topic!
Internet dating is very common, but challenging if the distance is much and there is uncertainty and difficulties to make it happen easily when those dating want to meet...
ReplyDeleteHi, Comrade!
ReplyDeleteA relationship surely turns challenging with distance. But, I think it also makes it interesting. And planning the encounter makes us think if it is actually what we want to do. You know, the process of bringing a desire into a reality: expenses, travel arrangements, location... it's not the same than meeting at a the closest Starbucks in 30 minutes.
Nice to see you here, Comrade. Thanks for visiting!